You can't stop the tears...

I saw the reflection of the light in her eyes when she said it "I'm gonna be alright! Don't worry.", she said while she was packing.

But now she's gone. Forever. I can't take her back or make the happened undone. 

"It's a normal flight to Canada, baby . No need to be worried." 

I still remember the sound of her voice... 

It wouldn't never be a normal flight to me. It would be horrible. 

How can a death be normal... Death is nothing you can forget easily, it's something you feel and see. Something you can't change.

I grabbed my old grey camping bag and walked out of the house. 

"Bye" , she gave me a hug. We hugged each other and to my surprise I noticed I was taller than  my mom. But wasn't it normal that teenage girls could be taller than their mom? 

The street is empty , not even my neighbors' kids are outside. The weather is too warm I guess. I would stay at home too but not today. It's her birthday, and like every year tears fill my eyes. I can see the cemetery.

"What are you doing ?" my father asked.

"I'm waiting for mom to call... she said she would call when the plane lands."

My father watched the news so I heard it. I was standing right next to him so I saw it.

"Plane crashes in water" That was more than enough to ruin my life.

I make my way through the hundreds of tombstones. Hundreds of names, hundreds of people, billions of tears.

I can see the flowers I put yesterday. The shiny red roses which remind me of her. Her beautiful warm rosy cheeks. I sit down and take my candles and my family photo out. And again I can't stop the tears from falling.

I didn't know funerals are so sad. Maybe because I have never been to one before.

What I know for sure is , is that I miss her. I miss her so much it hurts..

Life will never be the same ...

The candles' light isn't a lot but enough to see the picture. Slowly I glide over her name with my fingers. The stone is too cold.. not like her at all.

' A caring mother and a lovely wife'


Tears fall on the old stone and my voice isn't louder than a silent whisper....

" I love you Mom"